The first thing that I learned from horror movies is to never drink alcohol or do drugs. If you do drugs or drink alcohol in a horror movie then, more likely than not, you will be attacked and/or killed by a killer/monster. This is stated in Scream when Randy Meeks explains the “Rules of Horror.” This is further proven by the fact that after Randy had been drinking, he gets attacked by the Ghost face killer. 

The second thing that horror movies taught me was to never hide in a closet. Not only is it the most obvious hiding spot, but it also leaves you with no way to escape if you are found. In Halloween (1978) the main character, Laurie Strode, hid in a closet and was immediately found by Michael Myers. If you must hide somewhere, I recommend hiding under some blankets. That always seems to work. 

Next, never split up. If you split up from the rest of the group, you are susceptible to being attacked. If you get attacked while alone, you are practically a goner. If you stay with the group then you have a better chance of surviving. You may even have a chance of beating what/whoever is after you.  

Never try to fight the killer/monster one-on-one. More likely than not, the thing chasing you is stronger than you. If you are being chased by a human then you are better off running. If you are being chased by an animal or monster of some kind, you are pretty much dead.  

The fifth thing I learned is to never say, “I’ll be right back”. By saying those four words in a horror movie, you have essentially signed your death certificate. This is another rule of horror movies that Randy Meeks talks about in the original Scream. There are many occasions in which someone dies after saying they will be right back. The most notable examples being in Halloween, Friday the 13th, and Scream. 

Absolutely, never try to reason with the killer/monster. If you are trying to reason with a monster from a horror movie, I’d probably question your sanity. In A Nightmare on Elm Street 2 one of the characters tries and fails to talk to Freddy Kruger and he dies because of it. The same thing happens in Scream 4 when a character tries to talk the Ghost face killer out of killing him, which obviously doesn’t work, and he ends up dead anyway. 

Be quick. Many times the main character in a horror movie, will slowly walk closer to an unconscious killer when they should be running ten blocks away, preferably to a police station. If you must get closer to the killer, maybe to take off their mask, then be quick about it. Don’t give them any time to wake up and kill you, run to them, take off the mask, make a mental note of who it is (if you’re in a horror movie then the killer is most likely someone you know), then do as previously stated and run for your life.  

And never mess with creepy things. Many horror movies depict commonly creepy things as killers. Some examples of this are dolls on the Child’s Play franchise and clowns in It chapters 1 and 2. If you see anything creepy that could kill you, don’t mess with it. Instead, I would recommend running in the opposite direction. 

Turn around, the killer is always behind you! Most horror movies have the killer scare the characters by coming from behind them. Some prime examples of this are in Scream and Halloween. If you ever find yourself in a horror movie, you may want to turn around. 

The final thing I have learned from horror movies is to always assume that your attacker is alive. If you think that you have killed the killer, you are wrong. At the end of almost every horror movie, it shows the killer/monster lying “dead” on the ground and then jumping at the main character for one last scare. If you think the killer is still alive then either finish them off or tie them up and call the cops. Hopefully, you never find yourself in a horror movie.